an animal not wanting me petting it hurts more than any anon ever could
I decided to bleep out the lines on “I’m a Boss Ass Bitch” so I can listen to it properly in church.
IM LAUGHING SO HARD RIGHT NOW
I had high expectations and I was not let down
*checks if acne is still there*
Finding a typo in a book
don’t let tumblr make you believe that
- krusty krab is unfair
- mr krabs is in there
- standing at the concession
- plotting his oppression
phantom blood characters suck at eating
making plans with friends like
talk dirty to me
Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life
we take for granted all the times our nose isn’t stuffy
plucking your eyebrows is legitimately very stressful because you pull out one wrong hair and it’s game over
Welcome to hell, Megan
Cake Boss in a nutshell…
Customer: I want a nice chocolate cake for my young son, and he likes trucks, so could you maybe do a little frosting picture of a truck on the top?
Cake Boss: SOS WHAT WES GUNNA DO IS MAKE A GIANT TRUCK ENTIRELY OUTTA RICE CRISPIES AND COVA DAT IN FONDANT AND IZ GUNNA SHOOT SPARKS AND CATCH FIYAH, POSSIBLY KILLIN YOUR SON IN DA PROCESS.